The Patriarchy's Library
The library was created to hold all archived articles written for or by The Patriarchy. All articles written past a certain date will be removed from the study, the journey of Mastery, as well as the journey of slavery, and placed here, in the library.
Please understand that as the library holds all archives, the page may get quite long. Patience is, afterall, a virtue.
Please understand that as the library holds all archives, the page may get quite long. Patience is, afterall, a virtue.
All About Submission
Written by Master William's jaelina
Is the need to submit to Another a feeling that you are born with, something that is learned over time, or an evolution? This question has been asked by many. Where does submission come from?
I believe that all of these things contribute to the need to submit. I knew of the lifestyle from a young age as both my parents were and are in this lifestyle. I do believe that this lifestyle was in me from the day I was born. Naturally, I did not understand the lifestyle as a child, as I do now. But the fact still remains that I think that submission is in my very blood. I also believe in the term “natural slave” or, slave by nature. I believe that submission is a personality trait that I have had all of my life.
As with anything, my submission needed nurturing and growth. I did not start my journey in this lifestyle as a slave. It is true that before I met my Owner, I did not believe that I could be a slave. I am a very strong willed woman, with a quick tongue. It was my thought, that a slave could not be naturally submissive with these characteristics. I was sure that no Man would see the potential in me, to become a slave, much less a full-time, live in slave. To me, this does not mean that I am not a slave by nature. It merely meant that I needed someone to have faith in me, and see the potential in me that I myself did not admit to in the beginning. It is much like a baby bird in my eyes. It cannot fly until it learns that it is able to. They were born with the capability, but until someone (their mother) taught them how to fly, they are unsure of how to use their wings. A bird’s wings are to me, like the various and unique assets that a slave or submissive possesses. We have them, but like the bird, we don’t know right away how to put them to good use.
It has been said that female slaves submit to a Male Master out of inferiority and incompetence to manage and run her own life. Though I believe I was born with the need to submit in my heart, I did not “give in” to this need. I welcomed it with open arms. It was something that I felt I needed (and wanted) to embrace. I do not submit to my Master out of fear that I am incapable of managing my own life. I do so, because I want to put ultimate trust in the Man that I love. Taking the control that I possess over my own life and setting it into the hands of my Owner was and is for me, a very satisfying, and intensely heightening experience.
Like any other trait I was able to choose rather or not to build on it. If I wanted to feed it and make the feeling stronger. Again, this means that I chose to embark on this journey. My submission was not and never has felt like a weakness to me. As I have stated many times in other articles, submitting to Another takes strength and intelligence. Just as much as my submission has never felt like a weakness, I have never felt that my submission was forced. I submit willingly to my Master.
Just as much as I feel that submission is in my very being, I believe that submission is learned. As I said in the previous paragraph, I made the choice to build upon my need to submit. Doing this, took time and effort. My Owner and myself are still working on this, and I believe that we will work on it for as long as we are together on this Earth. Growing this trait takes knowledge, and knowledge is gained through learned experience (rather through personal or witnessed) as well as teaching. I of course did not know how to be a successful slave when I was born. It has taken years to establish the point in my slavery that I am at now.
The learning process is an assistance to growing and developing my pure and natural submission. As I serve my Master, as I watch others, as I read and write, I learn more and more. And through my newfound knowledge, my submission and my understanding of my submission grows. Again, we can go back to the baby bird I spoke of earlier. This bird was taught to fly by experience and knowledge. Like the natural slave or submissive has the capability to submit completely and wholeheartedly, the bird has the capability to fly. He simply must be taught.
Submission is also an adaptation and an evolution. Like I said previously, I started my pathway to submission out as a submissive (if I were to be called even that) and have now found my place as my Master’s slave girl. When I first learned that I wanted to embrace my submissive nature, I thought about things far differently than I do now. Not having a “Partner”, I had different expectations about myself and for myself than my Master and I do now. Even in my first relationship, I maintained much of the control over myself and my decisions. There was a big part of me that felt something was missing. At that time, I did not know just what that “something” was.
When my Owner and I met online, a large bit of my control was handed over to Him. As much as we both wanted me to be able to hand all of my personal control over to Him, we both knew that I would have to make certain decisions when He was not around. It was inevitable. So with our time online and speaking over the telephone, there were certain expectations that He had for me. And still, expectations that I had for myself. Now, as we are living together, those expectations have become our expectations for my slavery, service and submission. Rather than, His expectations plus my own expectations.
So, where does submission come from? Submission comes from the heart of the slave or submission, and evolves through experience, time, growth, strength and knowledge. And with all of these things, we can soar with the birds. Knowing that we too, have learned how to fly.
Written by Master William's jaelina
Is the need to submit to Another a feeling that you are born with, something that is learned over time, or an evolution? This question has been asked by many. Where does submission come from?
I believe that all of these things contribute to the need to submit. I knew of the lifestyle from a young age as both my parents were and are in this lifestyle. I do believe that this lifestyle was in me from the day I was born. Naturally, I did not understand the lifestyle as a child, as I do now. But the fact still remains that I think that submission is in my very blood. I also believe in the term “natural slave” or, slave by nature. I believe that submission is a personality trait that I have had all of my life.
As with anything, my submission needed nurturing and growth. I did not start my journey in this lifestyle as a slave. It is true that before I met my Owner, I did not believe that I could be a slave. I am a very strong willed woman, with a quick tongue. It was my thought, that a slave could not be naturally submissive with these characteristics. I was sure that no Man would see the potential in me, to become a slave, much less a full-time, live in slave. To me, this does not mean that I am not a slave by nature. It merely meant that I needed someone to have faith in me, and see the potential in me that I myself did not admit to in the beginning. It is much like a baby bird in my eyes. It cannot fly until it learns that it is able to. They were born with the capability, but until someone (their mother) taught them how to fly, they are unsure of how to use their wings. A bird’s wings are to me, like the various and unique assets that a slave or submissive possesses. We have them, but like the bird, we don’t know right away how to put them to good use.
It has been said that female slaves submit to a Male Master out of inferiority and incompetence to manage and run her own life. Though I believe I was born with the need to submit in my heart, I did not “give in” to this need. I welcomed it with open arms. It was something that I felt I needed (and wanted) to embrace. I do not submit to my Master out of fear that I am incapable of managing my own life. I do so, because I want to put ultimate trust in the Man that I love. Taking the control that I possess over my own life and setting it into the hands of my Owner was and is for me, a very satisfying, and intensely heightening experience.
Like any other trait I was able to choose rather or not to build on it. If I wanted to feed it and make the feeling stronger. Again, this means that I chose to embark on this journey. My submission was not and never has felt like a weakness to me. As I have stated many times in other articles, submitting to Another takes strength and intelligence. Just as much as my submission has never felt like a weakness, I have never felt that my submission was forced. I submit willingly to my Master.
Just as much as I feel that submission is in my very being, I believe that submission is learned. As I said in the previous paragraph, I made the choice to build upon my need to submit. Doing this, took time and effort. My Owner and myself are still working on this, and I believe that we will work on it for as long as we are together on this Earth. Growing this trait takes knowledge, and knowledge is gained through learned experience (rather through personal or witnessed) as well as teaching. I of course did not know how to be a successful slave when I was born. It has taken years to establish the point in my slavery that I am at now.
The learning process is an assistance to growing and developing my pure and natural submission. As I serve my Master, as I watch others, as I read and write, I learn more and more. And through my newfound knowledge, my submission and my understanding of my submission grows. Again, we can go back to the baby bird I spoke of earlier. This bird was taught to fly by experience and knowledge. Like the natural slave or submissive has the capability to submit completely and wholeheartedly, the bird has the capability to fly. He simply must be taught.
Submission is also an adaptation and an evolution. Like I said previously, I started my pathway to submission out as a submissive (if I were to be called even that) and have now found my place as my Master’s slave girl. When I first learned that I wanted to embrace my submissive nature, I thought about things far differently than I do now. Not having a “Partner”, I had different expectations about myself and for myself than my Master and I do now. Even in my first relationship, I maintained much of the control over myself and my decisions. There was a big part of me that felt something was missing. At that time, I did not know just what that “something” was.
When my Owner and I met online, a large bit of my control was handed over to Him. As much as we both wanted me to be able to hand all of my personal control over to Him, we both knew that I would have to make certain decisions when He was not around. It was inevitable. So with our time online and speaking over the telephone, there were certain expectations that He had for me. And still, expectations that I had for myself. Now, as we are living together, those expectations have become our expectations for my slavery, service and submission. Rather than, His expectations plus my own expectations.
So, where does submission come from? Submission comes from the heart of the slave or submission, and evolves through experience, time, growth, strength and knowledge. And with all of these things, we can soar with the birds. Knowing that we too, have learned how to fly.
The Black Cloak
Written by Master William`s jaelina
The awe and mystery of the Dominant/Domme Master/Mistress is often wrapped in the black cloak of the online world. Reality is often times lost with the character created and when the time comes to step into reality, disappointment and disillusionment is inevitable. Many Masters and Dominants make the mistake of getting themselves too shadowed by the cloak, along with the slave or submissive that they are with, that when the time comes, and reality roars it’s ugly face, many slaves or submissives find themselves disappointed. The person that they spent hours talking with on the phone or on the internet no longer seems so mysterious. They don’t see the perfect picture that was painted. His hair is not completely straight every time she sees Him. His jeans and t-shirt don’t depict the majestic Man that He described Himself as. The local Lord becomes human too.
Many will say, “I have sense enough to understand reality from online.” But those same people say, “online is just as real as real life.” I too agree that online relationships can be just as deep and real as real life. However, when a “character” is created, we can and often do get wrapped up in that character’s personality, perfectionism and faultlessness. Even if the personality of the “character” created is close to that of the Dominant or Master that created it, unreality cannot become reality. You cant walk into a public restaurant or store completely naked and most Dominants and Masters don’t really walk around in public with a whip at their side.
Online we have the luxury of basically creating our dream world. Perhaps our dream home. With a full
dungeon, beautiful master bedrooms with luxurious silk and expensive four post beds. But when your slave or submissive visits your home, can you really offer all of this? Did you make sure that they understood that you don’t really have all of the things that you created for them online? Do they understand that they will be walking into a two bedroom apartment, perhaps even a regular house? Do they understand that they wont be pulling up to the beautiful picture of the manor house or castle that you described as your home to them online?Online can be a fantasy world as long as we realize that fantasy does not exist in a real life environment. Don’t let yourself get caught inside the cloak of unreality.
Written by Master William`s jaelina
The awe and mystery of the Dominant/Domme Master/Mistress is often wrapped in the black cloak of the online world. Reality is often times lost with the character created and when the time comes to step into reality, disappointment and disillusionment is inevitable. Many Masters and Dominants make the mistake of getting themselves too shadowed by the cloak, along with the slave or submissive that they are with, that when the time comes, and reality roars it’s ugly face, many slaves or submissives find themselves disappointed. The person that they spent hours talking with on the phone or on the internet no longer seems so mysterious. They don’t see the perfect picture that was painted. His hair is not completely straight every time she sees Him. His jeans and t-shirt don’t depict the majestic Man that He described Himself as. The local Lord becomes human too.
Many will say, “I have sense enough to understand reality from online.” But those same people say, “online is just as real as real life.” I too agree that online relationships can be just as deep and real as real life. However, when a “character” is created, we can and often do get wrapped up in that character’s personality, perfectionism and faultlessness. Even if the personality of the “character” created is close to that of the Dominant or Master that created it, unreality cannot become reality. You cant walk into a public restaurant or store completely naked and most Dominants and Masters don’t really walk around in public with a whip at their side.
Online we have the luxury of basically creating our dream world. Perhaps our dream home. With a full
dungeon, beautiful master bedrooms with luxurious silk and expensive four post beds. But when your slave or submissive visits your home, can you really offer all of this? Did you make sure that they understood that you don’t really have all of the things that you created for them online? Do they understand that they will be walking into a two bedroom apartment, perhaps even a regular house? Do they understand that they wont be pulling up to the beautiful picture of the manor house or castle that you described as your home to them online?Online can be a fantasy world as long as we realize that fantasy does not exist in a real life environment. Don’t let yourself get caught inside the cloak of unreality.
Relationships Online; The Importance.
Written by: jaelina[W]
After talking with a friend recently, jaelina realized the talk that some speak about the importance of a relationship between two individuals online. The question: Are the feelings legitimate?
Like most questions, the answer depends upon the individual, or group of individuals that participate in the relationship. Many relationships online are indeed “true”. The feelings are real. Real tears are shed and real smiles, laughs and other emotions are felt.
Often times we hear such comments and questions as: “it`s just online.” Or “How can you love him? You`ve never met him.” jaelina has experienced the very same comments in the past when Master and she were together online. Our thoughts were; because Master and His girl had not met face to face, it did not mean that we did not love one another whole heartedly. To us, our hearts had met and touched. The devotion felt between us and for one another was very real. And we had the chance to get to know each other without the worry of our outer shells or any of that “physical” nonsense that often holds a person from entering into a relationship, despite what feelings they might feel for that person. Master and His jaelina were able to get to know each other more intensely, more intimately through our hearts and feelings.
Now, on the other side of this debate. Can the feelings not be convincing? Are there people out there, sitting on the other side of the screen getting their “kicks” out of having a woman (or Man) totally devoted to them? Absolutely. Especially within this lifestyle. There are as many “fakes” as there are true lifestylers. However, those same people are there in a relationship that might be started outside of the internet.
In both real time and online relationships, you have the chance of entering into a relationship with someone who is untrue. How do we avoid this? Caution. Take caution with any relationship that you partake in. And, understand yourself and your boundaries before you try to understand someone else.
Written by: jaelina[W]
After talking with a friend recently, jaelina realized the talk that some speak about the importance of a relationship between two individuals online. The question: Are the feelings legitimate?
Like most questions, the answer depends upon the individual, or group of individuals that participate in the relationship. Many relationships online are indeed “true”. The feelings are real. Real tears are shed and real smiles, laughs and other emotions are felt.
Often times we hear such comments and questions as: “it`s just online.” Or “How can you love him? You`ve never met him.” jaelina has experienced the very same comments in the past when Master and she were together online. Our thoughts were; because Master and His girl had not met face to face, it did not mean that we did not love one another whole heartedly. To us, our hearts had met and touched. The devotion felt between us and for one another was very real. And we had the chance to get to know each other without the worry of our outer shells or any of that “physical” nonsense that often holds a person from entering into a relationship, despite what feelings they might feel for that person. Master and His jaelina were able to get to know each other more intensely, more intimately through our hearts and feelings.
Now, on the other side of this debate. Can the feelings not be convincing? Are there people out there, sitting on the other side of the screen getting their “kicks” out of having a woman (or Man) totally devoted to them? Absolutely. Especially within this lifestyle. There are as many “fakes” as there are true lifestylers. However, those same people are there in a relationship that might be started outside of the internet.
In both real time and online relationships, you have the chance of entering into a relationship with someone who is untrue. How do we avoid this? Caution. Take caution with any relationship that you partake in. And, understand yourself and your boundaries before you try to understand someone else.
Age Difference In BDSM
Written by Master William’s jaelina
***Disclaimer: There are many different questions that can be asked about age when discussing BDSM. I will attempt to cover those that I am experienced in, in this article.
There are many questions that get asked when I am talking with others about my relationship with my Master, in this article I will answer as many as I can, in hopes that it might help others who are in a relationship with a large age difference, or those that are not and do not understand or just want to learn more.
Age is said to be only a number by many, but in truth, it is fairly hard to actually find someone with an open mind and nonjudgmental. Being in a Master and slave relationship with my Master and Husband, we both notice the subtle and not-so-subtle differences in the way that we are both treated. My Owner is twenty-one years my senior, and when we are out, (amazingly this is more prominent in a lifestyle setting) we notice the ones that seem to always want to “protect” me. It is almost as though because I am young, I am not intelligent or “old enough” to understand the relationship that I am in, and my Master is too old and far more knowledgeable, to understand my minimal experience in this lifestyle in comparison to His.
The truth is that Master does understand my lack of experience in both life and BDSM, and because of this, our relationship has grown ,rather than been hurt, by the difference in age. A Master and slave relationship is about a leader and a follower. My Master does lead me to things that on my own, would have taken me many years to get to. He teaches me things that before Him I did not know. This has helped our relationship because again, this has allowed Him to be the Master, and I His apprentice. I am a strong person on my own, but with my Master, I am even more so. Our strength and knowledge put together has made us both stronger.
Though I am younger than my Master, there are things that I have been able to help Him with. Things that I knew a bit more of and could discuss and share with Him. He is a strong enough Master to actually want conversation and opinion. He has never felt threatened by anything I might have been able to give a bit more thought or knowledge to. It is true that He is much more intelligent than me because of His experience, but because of His better knowledge, I am able to learn even more.It is humorous how many discredit young Masters/Dominants and slaves/submissives because of their age and/or experience (or lack there of) in this lifestyle. Every Master, Dominant, submissive, and slave started from zero. I have received many comments about my age and being able to be a slave at my age, because many assume I have very little experience, when in fact, I have been active in this lifestyle as a slave since the day I became old enough. The truth is that age doesn’t matter when it comes to the success of a Master and slave relationship. It comes down to devotion, commitment and a “try and try again” attitude.
As I spoke of in a previous paragraph, many older submissives, slaves, Dominants, Masters in our BDSM community feel the “need” to “protect” me because being young, I must be vulnerable and immature. The funniest part of this is that not many actually get to know Master and myself before assumptions start to be formulated. I have a good head on my shoulders and do not consider myself vulnerable in the least bit. I chose my Owner to be my Master just as much as He chose me to be His slave. Our age had nothing to do with the decision.
Another misconception that I find a lot of people make is that because I am much younger than my Master, I look to Him as a “father figure”. This, is far from the truth. I do not look to Master as a “Daddy” type in the least bit. He would probably beat the living day lights out of me if He ever heard me call Him Daddy, and I would probably beg Him to. It is just not our relationship at all. I love Him for who He is, His age had no part in my decision to accept submitting to Him as His slave.
Age can only effect the relationship when one or both parties allow it to. And though the difference in age can leave others assuming things that are untrue, it is, in the end, the couple with the age difference between them that has to understand between themselves what the age difference means to them.
Written by Master William’s jaelina
***Disclaimer: There are many different questions that can be asked about age when discussing BDSM. I will attempt to cover those that I am experienced in, in this article.
There are many questions that get asked when I am talking with others about my relationship with my Master, in this article I will answer as many as I can, in hopes that it might help others who are in a relationship with a large age difference, or those that are not and do not understand or just want to learn more.
Age is said to be only a number by many, but in truth, it is fairly hard to actually find someone with an open mind and nonjudgmental. Being in a Master and slave relationship with my Master and Husband, we both notice the subtle and not-so-subtle differences in the way that we are both treated. My Owner is twenty-one years my senior, and when we are out, (amazingly this is more prominent in a lifestyle setting) we notice the ones that seem to always want to “protect” me. It is almost as though because I am young, I am not intelligent or “old enough” to understand the relationship that I am in, and my Master is too old and far more knowledgeable, to understand my minimal experience in this lifestyle in comparison to His.
The truth is that Master does understand my lack of experience in both life and BDSM, and because of this, our relationship has grown ,rather than been hurt, by the difference in age. A Master and slave relationship is about a leader and a follower. My Master does lead me to things that on my own, would have taken me many years to get to. He teaches me things that before Him I did not know. This has helped our relationship because again, this has allowed Him to be the Master, and I His apprentice. I am a strong person on my own, but with my Master, I am even more so. Our strength and knowledge put together has made us both stronger.
Though I am younger than my Master, there are things that I have been able to help Him with. Things that I knew a bit more of and could discuss and share with Him. He is a strong enough Master to actually want conversation and opinion. He has never felt threatened by anything I might have been able to give a bit more thought or knowledge to. It is true that He is much more intelligent than me because of His experience, but because of His better knowledge, I am able to learn even more.It is humorous how many discredit young Masters/Dominants and slaves/submissives because of their age and/or experience (or lack there of) in this lifestyle. Every Master, Dominant, submissive, and slave started from zero. I have received many comments about my age and being able to be a slave at my age, because many assume I have very little experience, when in fact, I have been active in this lifestyle as a slave since the day I became old enough. The truth is that age doesn’t matter when it comes to the success of a Master and slave relationship. It comes down to devotion, commitment and a “try and try again” attitude.
As I spoke of in a previous paragraph, many older submissives, slaves, Dominants, Masters in our BDSM community feel the “need” to “protect” me because being young, I must be vulnerable and immature. The funniest part of this is that not many actually get to know Master and myself before assumptions start to be formulated. I have a good head on my shoulders and do not consider myself vulnerable in the least bit. I chose my Owner to be my Master just as much as He chose me to be His slave. Our age had nothing to do with the decision.
Another misconception that I find a lot of people make is that because I am much younger than my Master, I look to Him as a “father figure”. This, is far from the truth. I do not look to Master as a “Daddy” type in the least bit. He would probably beat the living day lights out of me if He ever heard me call Him Daddy, and I would probably beg Him to. It is just not our relationship at all. I love Him for who He is, His age had no part in my decision to accept submitting to Him as His slave.
Age can only effect the relationship when one or both parties allow it to. And though the difference in age can leave others assuming things that are untrue, it is, in the end, the couple with the age difference between them that has to understand between themselves what the age difference means to them.
Online To Real Life: Stepping Into Reality.
written by: jaelina[W]
I remember the day Master and I met real life. Seeing Him walk to the door of the resturaunt, feeling myself dart to meet Him there, everything that I had planned in my mind disappeared as I wrapped my arms around Him, tears flowing down my face. He held me close to Him and I remember suddenly thinking "oh God. I just touched Him without permission." And as He looked down at me, I knew, it was okay. My point is this, mistakes happen in real life. You plan out things with the best of intentions in mind, and then in an instant of overwhelming emotions, everything you planned may cease. Often times online we see girls, or boys, playing to get attention, claiming that "oh it was an accident." Can it be an accident online? Aren`t you reading what you type, as you type it? You have that time to think and say to yourself "I`m wrong here. I`m not doing the right thing here." But in real life, it is harder. When your Master is standing in front of you, and something hits you, maybe that urge to just say something smart. You no longer have that safety blanket of typing, and then erasing. You cannot take an eraser to real life. It simply wont erase.
This, is only one small change that we encounter when we step into the realms of real life. Many more seem to, slap us in the face persay. But while there are those things that you do not expect, there are those sweet surprises that fill you to the brim with warmth every time. I`ll start of with the unexpected or maybe not so easy changes, and save the best for last.
In real life, all unreality and "fantasy" fades. The mysticism simply cannot exist. This is the point where if you have not already, you realise, "Master is a human being just like I." There will be days when just like I, He wont be feeling well and I will have to take care of Him. He will make mistakes. Honestly, this realization is a relief. This realization of imperfection is what makes the real life relationship go round. These differences in each day is what makes every day unique. This realization also shows that the imfamous "rule book" is unrealistic. Each lifestyler has different quirks and characteristics that makes one set of rules and/or guidelines impossible.
Punishment and discipline is much more emotional and more effective. When online, the Master can give His slave assignments, and sometimes self administered physical punishments such as spanking, corner time, etc. can be done. However, there are many pieces of a punishment that make it effective. And when moving to real life, these parts are intensified. There is nothing like standing in front of your Master before a punishment, knowing that any minute He may order you to go over the bed or chair. Or kneeling in a corner, knowing that His eyes are upon you and if you move you are in trouble. Online, these things simply cannot be done as well. Sure, a camera can be set up, but at the end of it all, you are still the one actually administering the punishment. It is still your hand.
Now for the sweet parts. Online, the touch of your Master`s hand is never real. You dont feel a fingernail trailing down your arm, creating goose bumps. Of course, the touch online can still be a very emotional one. However, nothing beats the touch of flesh upon flesh, the look of satisfaction or pleasure in His eyes, or the warmth that crawls through you when He holds you.
Going from online to real life is like taking two pictures, one black and white and one color. Pick out all of the differences between that scene. That is how different the two are. Like night and day.
written by: jaelina[W]
I remember the day Master and I met real life. Seeing Him walk to the door of the resturaunt, feeling myself dart to meet Him there, everything that I had planned in my mind disappeared as I wrapped my arms around Him, tears flowing down my face. He held me close to Him and I remember suddenly thinking "oh God. I just touched Him without permission." And as He looked down at me, I knew, it was okay. My point is this, mistakes happen in real life. You plan out things with the best of intentions in mind, and then in an instant of overwhelming emotions, everything you planned may cease. Often times online we see girls, or boys, playing to get attention, claiming that "oh it was an accident." Can it be an accident online? Aren`t you reading what you type, as you type it? You have that time to think and say to yourself "I`m wrong here. I`m not doing the right thing here." But in real life, it is harder. When your Master is standing in front of you, and something hits you, maybe that urge to just say something smart. You no longer have that safety blanket of typing, and then erasing. You cannot take an eraser to real life. It simply wont erase.
This, is only one small change that we encounter when we step into the realms of real life. Many more seem to, slap us in the face persay. But while there are those things that you do not expect, there are those sweet surprises that fill you to the brim with warmth every time. I`ll start of with the unexpected or maybe not so easy changes, and save the best for last.
In real life, all unreality and "fantasy" fades. The mysticism simply cannot exist. This is the point where if you have not already, you realise, "Master is a human being just like I." There will be days when just like I, He wont be feeling well and I will have to take care of Him. He will make mistakes. Honestly, this realization is a relief. This realization of imperfection is what makes the real life relationship go round. These differences in each day is what makes every day unique. This realization also shows that the imfamous "rule book" is unrealistic. Each lifestyler has different quirks and characteristics that makes one set of rules and/or guidelines impossible.
Punishment and discipline is much more emotional and more effective. When online, the Master can give His slave assignments, and sometimes self administered physical punishments such as spanking, corner time, etc. can be done. However, there are many pieces of a punishment that make it effective. And when moving to real life, these parts are intensified. There is nothing like standing in front of your Master before a punishment, knowing that any minute He may order you to go over the bed or chair. Or kneeling in a corner, knowing that His eyes are upon you and if you move you are in trouble. Online, these things simply cannot be done as well. Sure, a camera can be set up, but at the end of it all, you are still the one actually administering the punishment. It is still your hand.
Now for the sweet parts. Online, the touch of your Master`s hand is never real. You dont feel a fingernail trailing down your arm, creating goose bumps. Of course, the touch online can still be a very emotional one. However, nothing beats the touch of flesh upon flesh, the look of satisfaction or pleasure in His eyes, or the warmth that crawls through you when He holds you.
Going from online to real life is like taking two pictures, one black and white and one color. Pick out all of the differences between that scene. That is how different the two are. Like night and day.
Aftercare
Written by Master William’s jaelina
Aftercare is a very necessary and utter important event that occurs (in most “play sessions“) after any physical or emotional “play” between a submissive/slave and a, his, or her Dominant/Master. During play, many things are going through both party’s mind that are left unsaid due to the fact that it might “break” or “spoil” the mindset at that time. Aftercare gives time for those unsaid things to be brought up and talked about, so that they do not become pent up and/or misunderstood. Aftercare also allows both the Master and slave to wind down and understand that everything is okay, no one was hurt, and that no harm was caused to either party.
Aftercare is an essential part of play because without it, the unsaid things or un-dealt-with emotions can cause emotional harm and misunderstanding of intentions, actions that happened during the session, and/or things that were being said. Often times during a scene or session, the Dominant partner might speak or “act” a certain way to get the submissive partner in a certain mindset. This change may strike the wrong cord (especially if the two involved in the scene do not regularly play together), and cause the submissive or slave to think something could be wrong. If the feeling is not strong enough or urgent enough to warrant stopping the scene immediately (i.e.; safe wording), aftercare again, allows time to discuss and understand.
After an intense or harsh scene it is not unusual for the slave or submissive to fall into a state of silence. It is the Dominant partner that then needs to make sure she is unharmed and able to go on with her day normally. Until she is fully responsive, it is wise to keep her in a calm state, usually meaning in the Dominant partner’s arms or with some kind of touch from His/Her hand (this shows her that everything is okay and that they care for his/her wellbeing). Crying may also occur during and after a scene, especially an intense one. Even though tears can be of joy, pain, fear, love and many other reasons, it is always smart for both parties to understand where these tears are coming from and what caused them to start. Again, this can take place during aftercare.
“Good aftercare” can even intensify positive feelings about the scene that just ended, but aftercare that is not effective or no aftercare at all can leave the slave or submissive feeling confused, sick, frustrated and even angry. These are unhealthy and unwanted emotions that can potentially hurt the relationship between the two partners. Emotional harm is the most important to watch out for as unlike physical harm, emotions are not always evident and easy to notice, especially if the submissive partner is holding these harmful feelings back. Talking through anything that needs to be discussed and making sure that there are no pent up feelings left makes sure that the submissive partner is ready and okay to end the aftercare.
Written by Master William’s jaelina
Aftercare is a very necessary and utter important event that occurs (in most “play sessions“) after any physical or emotional “play” between a submissive/slave and a, his, or her Dominant/Master. During play, many things are going through both party’s mind that are left unsaid due to the fact that it might “break” or “spoil” the mindset at that time. Aftercare gives time for those unsaid things to be brought up and talked about, so that they do not become pent up and/or misunderstood. Aftercare also allows both the Master and slave to wind down and understand that everything is okay, no one was hurt, and that no harm was caused to either party.
Aftercare is an essential part of play because without it, the unsaid things or un-dealt-with emotions can cause emotional harm and misunderstanding of intentions, actions that happened during the session, and/or things that were being said. Often times during a scene or session, the Dominant partner might speak or “act” a certain way to get the submissive partner in a certain mindset. This change may strike the wrong cord (especially if the two involved in the scene do not regularly play together), and cause the submissive or slave to think something could be wrong. If the feeling is not strong enough or urgent enough to warrant stopping the scene immediately (i.e.; safe wording), aftercare again, allows time to discuss and understand.
After an intense or harsh scene it is not unusual for the slave or submissive to fall into a state of silence. It is the Dominant partner that then needs to make sure she is unharmed and able to go on with her day normally. Until she is fully responsive, it is wise to keep her in a calm state, usually meaning in the Dominant partner’s arms or with some kind of touch from His/Her hand (this shows her that everything is okay and that they care for his/her wellbeing). Crying may also occur during and after a scene, especially an intense one. Even though tears can be of joy, pain, fear, love and many other reasons, it is always smart for both parties to understand where these tears are coming from and what caused them to start. Again, this can take place during aftercare.
“Good aftercare” can even intensify positive feelings about the scene that just ended, but aftercare that is not effective or no aftercare at all can leave the slave or submissive feeling confused, sick, frustrated and even angry. These are unhealthy and unwanted emotions that can potentially hurt the relationship between the two partners. Emotional harm is the most important to watch out for as unlike physical harm, emotions are not always evident and easy to notice, especially if the submissive partner is holding these harmful feelings back. Talking through anything that needs to be discussed and making sure that there are no pent up feelings left makes sure that the submissive partner is ready and okay to end the aftercare.